[FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:04 am

    Chojin wrote:Finished chapter 3, it's now editted to include the conclusion

    Wohoo!!

    You're updating Tuesdays, right?


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:10 am

    Yeah, I am

    At least that's the plan, lol

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Mon Aug 11, 2008 5:07 am

    Chojin wrote:Yeah, I am

    At least that's the plan, lol

    Stick to the plan, dude.

    Or else.


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Mon Aug 11, 2008 5:10 am

    I'll do my best, lol

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Wed Aug 13, 2008 8:10 am

    The posting of the next chapter has been moved back as it's not completed. Today hasn't gone according to plan and I haven't been able to work on it. I'm going to try and work on it tonight, so it is possible I can get the next chapter posted soon.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Wed Aug 27, 2008 12:41 pm

    At this point, the original plan was to have 6 chapters posted.

    The bad day mentioned in my last post has gone on considerably longer than expected.

    Things are now looking up in a big way; so I will soon be able to carry on with my chapters. Keep an eye on this space, I'm hoping to catch up in a big way Wink

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Tue Sep 09, 2008 1:24 am

    I apologise for the length of time it has taken me to reply. I'm going to aim to write an LJ entry to explain it everything. I've not made an entry in over a month, for the same reason.

    ----------

    TMNT: BROTHERS IN ARMS
    Chapter 4


    Deep in the dank sewers in the city, proper, lay a make shift home big enough for two. At this moment, only one person was present. The lone figure stood in a darkened corner surveying the humble, subterranean domicile; not that the rest of the makeshift home was much lighter. Not long ago, it was home to another. The lone figure stepped out of the darker corner and approached an alcove along the opposite wall. In the alcove was a rusting metal cabinet. Inside the cabinet, was a neatly folded ninja gui in its entirety. The figure removed the gui from the cabinet piece by piece, putting each bit on as it was taken from the cabinet.

    Once the figure was finished, he headed towards one end of the makeshift home. At this end, there was a ladder leading out through the floor. The figure jumped towards the ladder and snatched himself out of the air as he grabbed it; swinging himself round to the other side, lined up with the hole in the floor. He slid down the ladder. He landed with a splash in the water that gathered in the middle of the pipe. He looked up and down the otherwise empty pipe. He started down the dimly lit pipe, his direction seemingly unknown.

    He gait was deliberate; he knew exactly where he was going. He knew it was getting late, he’d been in the sewers long enough to know the changing “tides” within the different pools or the rushes of water through the pipes. He moved quickly through the twists and turns; often so fast that he ran up the sides of the large pipe.

    Not a thought clouded his mind, only his destination stood fast. He’d often been there, looking for something, but so far he had not succeeded. Still, he kept going back in hopes that he would find that which he sought. He was not going to give up, he never would.

    He approached an opening that led to a large chamber. He could hear voices, but nothing clear. They were happy voices; something he had not truly been in a long time. Having been this way many times before, he knew the best way to get across. He was running out of floor space. Ahead was a long drop into a pool of foul water.

    Just before the edge, he leapt upwards and grabbed the top lip of the pipe, swinging himself forward and up. He landed neatly in a crouch on top of the pipe. Without even stopping to calculate, he leapt forward again towards a horizontal pipe nearby. It was too high for him to land on, but he got a hand hold on it. He used it to swing himself towards a vertical pipe. He let go of the pipe and neatly grabbed the vertical pipe. As he jumped of this one towards, yet, another horizontal pipe, he heard a familiar sounding scream. He landed on the pipe and immediately looked down. Towards the pool and the voices he had heard before. He caught a glimpse of them before they both went tumbling into the water. He shook his head and continued his crossing, jumping from one pipe to the next.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:15 am

    OMFG!!

    Moremoremore!!


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Wed Sep 10, 2008 7:43 am

    I will be getting on with the chapter soon, but the problem is, I've been out of it for a while. I need to read through both our fics to get me back in the mood.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Thu Oct 09, 2008 1:32 am

    TMNT: BROTHERS IN ARMS
    Chapter 5


    Without anymore distraction, the figure made it through the twisted tunnels of the sewers to a manhole some distance from his makeshift home. He rarely liked going topside, but he knew he had to. He had picked a manhole that was in a fairly “low traffic” area.

    Topside, there was a construction site that had been abandoned during the first few weeks after an incident some time back. After the initial shock, construction crews got back to work. Slightly behind schedule, the building was now more than just a bare skeleton of reinforced steel. The nearby manhole cover wobbled as the figured freed it and moved it to the side. At this time, there was a small crew of workmen patrolling the area doing small jobs and a general clean up.

    Carefully replacing the manhole cover, the figure quickly made for the outer fence of the construction site. Pressing himself against the high blue fence, the figure looked both ways and listened for any noises that would indicate that he was close to someone. Satisfied there was no one near, the figure leapt silently over the fence. Here’s where it got tricky. The figure quickly ducked behind a stack of wood as he carefully surveyed the scene. There was a clearing between him and the main structure. In the clearing, there were piles of debris, like piles of flotsam in an otherwise clean sea. The clearing wasn’t the problem; it was the group of people milling about the piles, clearing them away piece by piece.

    The figure was presented with several options. The first was unthinkable; retreat and find another route. Given that he wanted to be on top of the main structure, this was not a workable option. He could always make a mad dash for the structure, but the chance of him being seen by any number of the workers still present was daunting. He didn’t want an all out confrontation with the workers; he had no problem with them. His only option was to create a distraction, or wait for one to happen.

    Waiting was not an option; it had to be done now. He looked around for something that would serve his purpose. Nothing that wouldn’t cause too much damage came to mind. There were a number of vehicles he could sabotage or use in some way to distract the workers, but he could see no way of using them safely. He thought of shutting off the generator, killing power to the lights and power tools. This, however, would send them all running in his direction. If he was to use the generator, he’d have to be sure, he’d have to know the exact route he would take to the main structure.

    He approached the generator, getting ready to shut it off when something caught his eye. In the small building that served as the site office, a light went out. The figure watched it for a second, and then turned his attention to the flood lights that stood around the place. He glanced around the floor and found some large stones that would have to do in the place of no projectiles. He wasn’t as prepared as he wanted to be, but he had always said that he wanted to be resourceful.

    He picked out three lights that were close enough to him to take out without attracting people too close. He took a few moments to think things over in his head properly, make sure he had everything planned out how he wanted it. He bent down to pick up the stones he had picked. Taking a deep breath, he suddenly let loose with the stones, hitting each light quickly.
    “What the hell is going on?” He heard someone shout.
    “Some lights went out.” Another voice shouted. This wasn’t the response he had expected and didn’t bother listening to the rest of the exchange. Without another thought, he began to move away from the generator.
    “Someone check the generator; maybe it’s on the fritz like the old one.” A voice shouted from the office. The figure realised his time here was coming to an end, he had to do something. He reached for the cut off switch and turned it off. For a second, the lights stayed on, but then everything faded. The lights faded to black; the thrum of the power tools faded to an eerie silence.
    “This is just great; I knew I shouldn’t have come back to work here.” A worried voice said from close by. Without another thought, the figure made a run for the main structure. Even in the dark, the figured knew what he was doing.

    The outer wall was drawing close to him, but his approach was not slowed. As he reached the wall, he leant back slightly and began to run up the wall. A window ledge was fast approaching, but the figured did not need it. He could feel his momentum slipping, but with one last burst of energy he leapt further up the wall and past the window. With nothing to hold on to, the figure put his hands on the wall at the peak of his jump and was held fast. He took a glance at the ground and found himself proud at his height, even though he could still jump down silently from this height. The figure turned his attention to the top of the building and continued his miraculous ascent.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Fri Oct 10, 2008 10:55 pm

    Write mooooore!!


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Fri Oct 10, 2008 10:58 pm

    Progress has momentarily halted for now. I'm tying to work out some details for the next chapter.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Kifu on Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:33 am

    Oh noooo! You can't halt the process. You've got me hooked, too. Very Happy
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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:36 am

    Last I saw, there wasn't a new post in this thread, lol. I was just coming here to tell you that I can now continue as I have worked out enough detail to do so.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Kifu on Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:42 am

    Yay. *BIIIIG smile*
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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:14 am

    Chojin wrote:Last I saw, there wasn't a new post in this thread, lol. I was just coming here to tell you that I can now continue as I have worked out enough detail to do so.

    Awesome!!

    I should have a new chapter up tomorrow myself. =D


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:32 am

    oh yay ^_^

    I must re-read the previous chapters.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:52 am

    Chojin wrote:oh yay ^_^

    I must re-read the previous chapters.

    Go for it!!


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Sun Oct 12, 2008 1:17 pm

    You guys will be glad to hear that I have made some headway with my story. However, I have hit a little snag, but nothing a good night's sleep shouldn't solve.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Mon Oct 13, 2008 1:25 pm

    TMNT: BROTHERS IN ARMS
    Chapter 6


    After making short work of the climb, the figure had finally made it a flat, horizontal surface. Construction hadn’t made it up any further, so there was still a little way to go to get to the top. The figure took this pause to work a few things out and assess how best he should continue.

    He was about to make his way to a nearby crane arm just a short jump away from the edge when he heard a slight noise coming from above him. The figure’s head snapped towards the source, but he saw nothing but the ceiling above him. He stood still for a moment just watching the spot on the ceiling where the noise had come from, listening intently. He could hear muffled noises coming from the floor above.

    The figure silently made his way to the edge, where he could make his ascent. He climbed unfinished portion of the outer wall. First he peeked over the edge. He was surprised by what he saw; or rather what he didn’t see. There was nothing; nothing to disturb the silence. He started to wonder if he was hearing things. The sound he had heard now seemed like a ghostly whisper in his memory. He had to make sure; he didn’t like the thought that he could be hearing things.

    The figure pulled himself up and headed towards what he assumed was the beginnings of a stair well in the centre of the floor. He swiftly made his way to it. Pressing himself against the wall, he looked round the corner. The space ahead of him was as empty as the floor had been when he peeked over the edge.

    The figure was just about to turn round, when he was struck in the side of the head. The impact almost sent him sprawling to the floor, though he remained upright. He quickly regained his balance and immediately prepared to defend himself. He was met by three unusual faces.
    “Look at what we have here” Said the largest of the three.
    “Bit early for trick or treat’n, isn’t it?” Said another, only slightly smaller than the first in every respect, with a distinct grunt. The smallest of the three just stood there giggling to itself. The figure relaxed himself a bit, allowing himself a little chuckle.
    “What’s the matter? You find something funny, chuckles?” The first said as he stepped into the figures face.
    “Let’s see now. We have the biker pig over there that looks like he’s packing a punch but lacks the brain power to do so.” The figure said as he stepped round the towering being that stood before him. The Pig went to say something, but didn’t get a chance to before the smallest of the three started laughing again. “Then we have kid smiley here who can’t keep a straight face, jumping around like some sort of prepubescent monkey.” This comment replaced the playful laugh emanating from the diminutive creature with growls of contention. “And then we come to you,” the figure finally said, feeling incredibly brave as he stood down his three assailants, “You may be a lumbering mass of muscle, but you lack speed enough to do sufficient damage. I’d have to say that more damage is being to me with your breath than anything else.”
    “You’ve made a big mistake, Shorty.” The large beast said as he stepped right into the figures face.
    “And you better ease of outa my face before something bad happens to you.” The figure said as he narrowed his eyes slightly, stepping further into the saurian beasts face.

    After scant moments, the large beast made a swipe for the darkly clad figure. The beast connected with nothing but air as the figure dodged deftly aside. Without a second’s hesitation, the smallest of the three leapt straight at the figure, hissing and clawing away. It’s small frame lending speed to the savage attack. The mystery figure barely had enough time to turn around and dodge the attack, which was quickly followed by a brutal charge from the feral pig. The charge connected, sending the figure skidding across the ground. As he slid across the ground, the small creature, that closely resembled a monkey with a serious attitude problem, jump onto his body. The monkey started pounding him with his small fists, his speed and the attempts to try and slow down made it difficult for the monkey’s mobile mount to block the attacks. As they came to a stop, the monkey leapt off again and quickly moved out of the way. Dazed slightly, the figure got up. He was immediately struck in the midriff by the largest of the three. Stumbling backwards, he slammed into the steel upright that formed part of the skeleton, narrowly escaping falling to his doom. He slumped to the ground on one knee, bracing himself with the opposite arm.
    “Not so tough now, are you.” The large saurian beast said as he stalked towards the broken figure.
    “Lucky shot.” The figure said as he picked himself up of the floor. “Beginner’s luck. I’m just getting warmed up.” The figure concluded as he dropped into a fighting stance. He stretched his fingers out towards his attackers and beckoned them forth with a twitch of his fingers. The large beast growled as he charged the figure. Despite his size, he was quite fast; but his attack was predictable. As the beast approached, he slashed at him with a meaty claw. The figure leapt up and pushed of the vertical beam, pushing him over the beast beneath him. Before he had cleared the beasts, the figure we met by the snarling face of the monkey coming at him. Spinning in the air, the figure kicked the monkey aside. As he landed, he bent himself low, narrowly avoiding the burly arm of the beast as it spun back round. Ahead of him, the pig had been waiting ready to bring his fist down on the figure. Not fast enough; the pig smashed his hand into hard ground.

    “Zaru, get’im.” The beast growled as he shoved the pig out of the way. The monkey, now identified as Zaru nodded as it ran towards the darkly clad figure. The figure retreated out of the way of the other two mutants, trying to keep the monkey between them. Zaru kept coming, flailing relentlessly. The mysterious figure kept blocking, wait for an opening whilst taking in everything Zaru was doing. After a few moments of retreating from his assailant, the figure realised that he was coming close to the edge. It was time to go on the offensive in an attempt to force Zaru back. Each blow was carefully aimed, not so they would connect, but to lead the monkey into a false sense of security and forcing it to leave itself open. His chance came quickly. The figure threw a punch across the Zaru’s body, causing it to try and deflect the blow. Quickly, the figure grabbed the wrist of the blocking hand. He pushed the hand out, and the monkey off balance as he stepped in so his back was to the monkey. He quickly brought his elbow up and into the side of Zaru’s head. Dazed from the blow, Zaru’s concentration was thrown, slightly; the figure grabbed Zaru’s wrist with both hands and threw the monkey over his shoulder.

    Behind him, the figure could hear the impatient growls of the towering beast and the expectant grunts of the pig.
    “Bebop, don’t fail me.” The saurian beast hissed.
    “Don’t worry Reggie, I won’t” Bebop replied. Bebop grunted as he charged at the figure that had just taken out Zaru. The figure turned to see Bebop bearing down upon him. He leapt to one side, out of immediate danger, at the last second.
    “Here; piggy-piggy-piggy.” The figure said with an oink from the safe distance he had managed with his leap.
    “I’m not a pig, I’m a Razorback.” Bebop grunted as he scowled at the figure. He charged again, but this time, the figure leapt backwards as if leading him somewhere, “quit moving so I can pound you.” Bebop grunted.
    “Where’s the fun in that?” the figure said as Bebop charged at him again. This time, the figure jumped directly up as Bebop’s club-like fist slammed into the ground, cracking it in the process. The figure came down on Bebop’s shoulders, but immediately pushed off again towards the unfinished stair well.
    “This is your last chance to hit me.” The figure said as he backed himself to the edge. Below was a single story fall onto the stairs leading down to the next floor; at this time, there were no stairs onto this floor. Only two sides of the stair well were open, making it a dangerous area to be messing around in. Fortunately, no one was messing around. Bebop turned to face his annoyance.
    “I’ve had enough of you. You’re going down.” Bebop huffed, blowing hot air through his nostrils; the cold air causing it to steam the moment it escaped. He scowled for a second before charging the figure, yet again. The figure stood his ground. Bebop bore down upon him with a speed that the figure had not seen in him, but Bebop was still too slow. Bebop was almost in range of him when Reggie shouted “Bebop, stop.” But it was too late. The figure stepped backwards and dropped from sight. Surprised, Bebop wasn’t able to stop before tumbling over the edge and down the stairs below; finally coming to rest once he had reached the bottom of the flight below.

    The figure had grabbed hold of the edge and swung his legs up to the ceiling. As with the climb up here, he was held fast. He clambered back onto the floor above him.
    “I thought I was going down?” He said as he looked at the unconscious Razorback, laying two floors down. As the figure dusted himself off, he was struck hard from behind. The force was enough to force him over the edge and over the hole below, saving him from the same fate that had befallen Bebop. However, the figure was not quite on the floor, he slipped off the edge. Catching himself by his finger tips, the figure was left dangling above the prone form that was Bebop.
    Above him, Reggie leapt towards the other edge of the floor he was on. He caught the edge and swung himself down to join the figure on the floor below. Reggie turned round to face the figure, hanging helplessly of the edge. He bent down and grabbed him as the figure started pulling himself up. As Reggie pulled the figure up, he slammed his fist into the figure stomach.
    “I hope you didn’t forget about me, kid” Reggie said as he pulled the figure close to his face. The figure made a motion as if he was trying to hold back from being sick.
    “Haven’t you ever heard of Mentos?” The figure struggled to say as he tried to catch his breath. Snarling, Reggie threw the figure behind him. Fortunately, the construction workers had managed to start putting walls up on this side; else the figure would’ve gone right off the edge. Feeling rather battered, the figure slowly stood up; Reggie stalking towards him all the time. As he stood up fully, he lost sight of Reggie for a split second. Reggie had lowered himself to the ground and dashed towards the staggering figure before standing up to full height while delivering a bone rattling uppercut. The figure slammed into the low vaulted ceiling, cracking it before crashing down onto the floor again. Bloodied and shaking, the figure stood up again before immediately falling to his knees again.
    “Say good night” Reggie said as he quickly approached the broken figure before him.
    “Good... night...” The figure choked as he saw two huge fists coming at him. With barely enough energy to stand up, the figure took the full brunt of the devastating blow. The force was, by far, the worst he had endured, this night; sending him sailing towards a large opening the workers had left for a window. Outside was an unfinished tower of scaffolding. As best he could, the figure turned himself in the air. He slammed into bars on the other side, knocking the wind from him. He fell inwards, tumbling down to the boards a floor below him. The impact on the boards causes them to shift slightly. Opening his eye, he could barely see, through the haze that clouded his vision, Reggie looking down at him. Seeing the figure’s prone form below, battered and broken, Reggie watched the figure with morbid interest. Sitting up on the boards was painful, every movement causing a pang of pain rush through him. He shook his head to try and rid himself of the haze and wretched slightly as unconsciousness threatened to take him. He tried to stand but instantly dropped again. The boards shifted again; this time they fell, sending the figure dropping to the boards below. The boards above him were fell with him. Quickly, he curled up into a ball to protect himself from the boards above. However, this made his landing more forceful, causing the boards below to snap. Now he was free falling with two floors worth of board falling with him. There were no boards below him for two floors. He wasn’t going to stop falling anytime soon. Inside his mind, he knew this and so did everything he could to prevent as much damage as possible. Crashing through the next set of boards, the next stop was solid ground. Smashing into the ground, the figure had every bit of wind knocked from him. All he could do know was watch the boards make their final approach. This was the last thing he saw before everything faded to black.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Mon Oct 13, 2008 10:21 pm

    Awesooome!!

    I love it!!

    And, I already told you about Bebop, but I won't say anything here just yet. XP


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Mon Oct 13, 2008 11:25 pm

    Glad you liked it ^_^

    As I told you, I wasn't entirely sure about the fight, as I'm not used to writing fight scenes on my own.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Mon Oct 13, 2008 11:28 pm

    Chojin wrote:Glad you liked it ^_^

    As I told you, I wasn't entirely sure about the fight, as I'm not used to writing fight scenes on my own.

    Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. They're scenes I have most trouble with coz I'm not used to writing them, and because it all happens so fast in my head.

    XP


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Chojin on Mon Oct 13, 2008 11:35 pm

    I find it difficult writing fast paced things, because I want to put so much detail in, it slows it down.

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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

    Post by Fizzie on Mon Oct 13, 2008 11:43 pm

    Chojin wrote:I find it difficult writing fast paced things, because I want to put so much detail in, it slows it down.

    Yeah, I think it's important to find a nice balance where things are explained enough to be visualized in the head, but not explained so much that it slows the pace down for the reader.


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    Re: [FanFic] TMNT: Brothers In Arms

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